The March of the Grammar Nazis

The early bird: get us the worm!

I'm bringing up a classic complaint. We all know what I'm talking about, we've all seen it:
You or someone you know posts a status on Facebook, something like "If you don't see The Heat, your missing out!". And someone in the comment section will correct them: "*you're".

The person who is writing the comment could be called a "Grammar Nazi". Grammar Nazis are labeled as people who live to go onto the Internet and correct their friends' grammar. People who constantly have their friends correcting them think the Nazis are annoying. The Nazis think their friends who can't spell are annoying. Who's in the right here?

A bit of bus graffiti I found, with proper grammar to boot.

I am aware that I tend to make the occasional typo. I'll probably reread this post 20 times to make sure I didn't miss anything, and I might anyway. Feel free to say "you used the wrong 'their' in this paragraph" and I'll accept it and fix it, you troll.

But let's get into it: people have been using bad grammar on the Internet ever since the Internet was born. Is it really that big a deal? Technically no; if someone misspells something on Facebook nobody gets hurt or dies, someone just looks the fool. The audience will hopefully know what they mean and mentally correct their friend.



 So do grammar Nazis have sticks up their asses? Some of them do, they are just bossy and live to correct others. It's not fun or cute, but it's who they are. Do I think they should correct people who misspell things?

Yes. Yes I do.

For the most part, anyway. Again, I'm guilty of it too. Sometimes you just type too fast or don't think and get your "their/there/they're" or "you're/your" mixed up. It happens, I GET IT. But there's a difference between people who are in a hurry and people who just don't know what they're doing.

It's not like I'm making fun of people who misspell tricky words. We aren't talking about forgetting the extra "u" in "vacuum" or having a bitch of a time with "definitely" (I always put an A instead of an E). I'm making fun of people who have a hard time grasping basic grammar.  It's like not knowing basic math. If someone put on Facebook "hey guys, 2+3=9" you'd probably make fun of them. Of course if someone's putting math problems on Facebook you should rethink your "friendship" anyway.

But again, why does it matter? Well...you look dumb and you actually might not be dumb. Blatantly misspelling words makes you look unintelligent, and since spell check is everywhere it also makes you look lazy and uncaring. This is a language we ALL speak and read, so why is it so difficult to master the writing of it?

A note at my workplace. I corrected the grammar. I'm that guy.

Admittedly a lot of people don't need to read these days. There are lots of jobs that require minimum to no reading skills, and many people will choose not to read a book or newspaper if they're given the option. Thus, when these people get on Facebook they confuse "are" and "our" simply because they sound the same.  

 I don't mean to come off that misspelling words makes you a bad person. I also don't want to mock people with dyslexia or learning disabilities because I understand some people have trouble with this stuff. But as a population I think we should be doing better.

It's a small thing when you see someone misspell on Facebook. But suppose they don't get corrected and then they believe that they're writing proper English. Then they go write a cover letter for a job application and wonder why no one is taking them seriously. They can't find work at a job in their field so they end up working a dead end job they can't escape. Eventually they fall into a sick depression all because they think "it's" is possessive. Rough, right?

So stop defending yourself as if it's the Grammar Nazis' fault you write like a child. Just admit that you're wrong and the next time you post something, give it a second read through and see if it looks right. If you're still wrong, pick up a book or something and read. Just read. It's fun! There's so much to read and there's no good reason not to. You'll find something you like, I promise.

I'm sure I've managed to come off as a tight ass or a snob. But I don't care. It gives me a sick sense of satisfaction when I see people with master's degrees that can't write a third-grade sentence. I'm sure they can do lots of things I can't...but they'd have to tell me about it in person, because they sure as hell can't write it down.

 
So I say lay off of the Grammar Nazis, they just want you to look like the intelligent person you probably are. The best way to avoid one is simply to learn how to form sentences. It's very simple. I should clarify that I am not a Grammar Nazi. When I see someone with horrid grammar I think what a dumbass and go on with life. So prove me wrong, Internet! Go update your life and use an apostrophe correctly! I believe in you!