Zombies and Ho's

Happy Sunday everybody! Also, Happy Halloween. I know it's Wednesday, but everyone already celebrated this weekend. Plus I don't have a lot to say about the holiday because I don't care about it a whole lot, so trick or treat and what have you.


I did get somewhat into the spirit last night, however. After working a double shift at the PPT (last chance to see Born Yesterday this afternoon!) I went with my friend Jodi to see the original Night of the Living Dead. It was a return trip to The Manor movie theater for me and this was the last of their four-part Vintage Horror Movie series.

I had never seen the horror classic before so I was really excited about it. A nice little surprise was that Russell Streiner, a producer and actor in the film, was at the Manor last night. He was taking pictures with fans and did a Q&A after the movie (we didn't stay, we had to work in the morning). Mr. Streiner has done a lot of work with bringing film production to Pennsylvania, and is chairman of The Pittsburgh Film Office.

Anyway, I thoroughly enjoyed Night of the Living Dead. I was surprised at some of the gore (zombies arguing over eating intestines was a nice surprise) and that the main hero was African-American, which was a huge deal at its time. However, there were a few clear anti-feminist themes in the film. Our main heroine, Barbara, spends the movie in a cationic stage which annoys the other heroes (and, frankly, the audience). But it was a different time then, so I suppose I'll overlook it.

In other news, I know I haven't blogged about books in a while, but I just finished a good one. It's Pimp, the autobiography of reformed pimp/author Iceberg Slim (real name Robert Beck). Sounds like an odd choice, probably. I decided to read it after a recurring joke at the PPT had people calling me Iceberg Slim. Since Slim was a rough, famous, black pimp and I am none of those things, the nickname is a bit ironic. But the book intrigued me.

Published in 1969, Pimp recounts Slims life up to the age of 43, when he stopped pimping. He talks about the love for his mother, his first experience pimping, multiple trips to jails and prisons, doing hard drugs, and building a "family" of whores. The slang is a bit hard to get into, but eventually I got used to it all. Slim has quite the way with words, making phrases that can be incredibly graphic while also oddly poetic. Here's an excerpt: "He looked at me and made that clacking sound against the roof of his mouth with his tongue. You know, that mischievous, weirdly joyful sound that a young kid makes the instant before he rams a hat pin into your ear drum" -Iceberg Slim, Pimp.


The term "pimpin ain't easy" proves very true here: Slim had a rough life during the pimp game, and in the end of the book he admits he'd have died much earlier if he had kept it up (Slim died in 1992). Here are one of the final thoughts he has about the subject:

"I had spent more than half a lifetime in a worthless, dangerous profession. If I had stayed in school, in eight years of study I could have been an M.D. or lawyer. Now here I was, slick but not smart, in a cell. I was past forty with counterfeit glory in my past, and no marketable training, no future. I had been a bigger sucker than a square mark. All he loses is scratch. I had joined a club that suckered me behind bars five times." -Iceberg Slim, Pimp.

So that's what I've been up to, friends. Hope everyone has a lovely Halloween week. I'll probably have nightmares about undead prostitutes, but then that's normal isn't it?

Wednesday with Wanda

Hello y'all.

I've had quite the busy week, at least by my standards. In personal news I started a new job (actually, it's the same job at a different location) and trust me, there's nothing blog-worthy about it. I've started playing Tiny Tower on my phone, so if you don't like your job I suggest downloading that.

Monday I was fortunate enough to participate in FUNDS: True Stories About Money. I told a little story about life in WV and transporting a baby calf in the back of my father's blazer. It was for a good cause, but I'll just suggest you read the post Chelsea wrote, she tells you all about it there. Plus I don't like to toot my own horn.

Then on Wednesday I had off work from the PPT so I went to the Altar Bar to see the Queen of Rockabilly, Ms. Wanda Jackson.

Never heard of Ms. Jackson? You're not alone. I only discovered her recently. Which is crazy bizarre, because she's been singing for years and hasn't stopped yet. Wanda helped bring awareness to the rise of rock and roll back in the fifties, even working with (and dating) the King himself. Her rough, gravely voice made her songs unlike anything else at the time. While she may not have the same "bite" she did back then (Ms. Jackson celebrates her 75th birthday tomorrow), she sang her concert last night without any signs of struggle and KILLED IT.

Daniel Romano playing.

I had never been to the Altar Bar before. It's a really neat-looking place with a wide open area for dancing and a bar off to the side. There wasn't a huge crowd (it was a Wednesday, after all) but the respectable crowd made up for it with their enthusiasm. Wanda's opener was Canadian country singer Daniel Romano, who had a nice mellow charm as he crooned out a more "traditional" country sound. Give him a listen, if you'd like.

Wanda takes the stage.

When Romano was over, there was a brief break and then Wanda's band play a few tunes (I forget their names, but they were fantastic). Then the Queen entered, dressed in her trademark pink fringed vest. She was being escorted and needed help climbing the stairs to the stage. When she finally reached the stage she quipped "You all act like an old lady just got on stage". It was the first of many funny lines she'd give throughout the night.

Wanda's set list picked songs from all over her 58 year career. She opened with the first song she ever recorded "I Gotta Know" and then one of her more popular hits "Funnel of Love". While signs of age are inevitable, this woman stills know how to sing, rock, and entertain a crowd.

Wanda eventually got to the part of her show where she talks about Elvis. It was just fascinating to hear her talk about him- I mean, she worked (and dated) ELVIS. That's pretty freaking cool. While she admits he wasn't her one true love, she says she owes everything to him and pays tribute to him at all her shows. She then proceeded to sing "Heartbreak Hotel". I recorded a minute in the middle for y'all.

She then moved on to the album she made a year ago with Jack White, The Party Ain't Over (which I love). On that CD she covers Amy Winehouse's "You Know I'm No Good". She talked about how she was reluctant to sing that song at first, but after Jack White insisted, she fell in love with it. Then she talks about how she never got the chance to meet Ms. Winehouse. I recorded her talking about Amy, and singing the first two verses of the song. (Blogger is having issues uploading the video, so I put it on Youtube. Enjoy.)

"You know I'm no....good."

Then she moved on to her latest album, Unfinished Business, which was produced by country/folk singer Justin Townes Earle. Unlike Jack White's production, Earle took Jackson back to her country/rockabilly/blues roots on the new album (released only two weeks ago). Wanda took out some note cards, confessing she needed a little assistance with lyrics on these new songs. She then told a story about when she saw Elvis pull out some written lyrics on television. "If it was good enough for the King, it's good enough for me!"

Her new album sounds like it's gonna be great, so I put it on my wish list of CD's I'll buy next. I really had a fantastic time at the concert, seeing a legend not many people are familiar with. It's very inspiring to see someone who's almost 75 years old still doing what they love to do and still rocking it out. I hope I'm half as lucid when I'm her age. And I hope I'm still singing her songs in the shower.

Craigslist and Invisible Me

This may come as a surprise to you, but there are a lot of freaks on Craigslist. If you have some downtime (and if you're reading this, you have downtime) click over to Craigslist and click away at the rent ads or the personals. Remember if a personals posting has "picture" next to it, you may wanna click at your own risk.

Lately I've been trying to find myself a cheap room, so I've turned to Craigslist on more than one occasion. I tend to overlook some of the "shadier" postings and I have managed to find a few cool rooms. It's a matter of avoiding people who seem a bit...off...

Take for instance one poster who was looking for a "semi nude roommate". As in, he wanted a roommate he could be comfortable being naked in front of, since he doesn't always wear a towel out of the shower and things like that. Granted, for most people this would be called a "deal-breaker". I could tolerate semi-nudeness, I think, but not as the crux of the advertisement. The poster made no mention of utilities or location...just "hey, I get naked. That cool?" That depends, who's paying for electricity? You are?!? Hell yeah it's cool, let's see it.

I'm kidding.

But today I had a fairly sketchy encounter as the Universe told me to stop looking at Craigslist for a bit. Today I went to look at a house with a room available. The rent was super cheap so I jumped on it. I spoke to the man 'selling' the room, Max, last night on the phone. He informed me that he, his son, and two other men lived in the house and there were three Cocker Spaniels. I was already half convinced I did not want this room, but decided to go for shits and giggles.

So today I hopped on a bus and took a brisk 20 minute walk to this house. It was in a clean enough neighborhood and the house itself was pretty decent-looking, if maybe a bit dirty. I get up on the porch and the big front door is open but the little 'screen' door isn't. I knocked and sent the three dogs (knew I had the right place) into a barking frenzy. Yet no one came to the door.

I stood on the porch a bit and eventually a man came off from the street and let the dogs out. He was petting them and he knew their names, so I relaxed a bit. Before I could try to introduce myself, Max came out of the house. Max was an older man, in his 60's, and he looked a bit "disheveled" and had a slow way of speaking.

Max and the guy from the street (let's call him John) proceeded to have a conversation RIGHT IN FRONT OF ME and neither of them bothered to introduce themselves to me. So I stood there, nodding along like I was a part of this lovely porch chat. Eventually John told Max he would take the dogs for a walk around the block and he'd be back soon. Max said "alright, I'll be working in the yard." and went right back into the house, leaving me on the porch.

I was, you might guess, confused.

Who doesn't say anything to a stranger on their porch? I could have shot them both! I felt like I just wandered into some scene in a play that I wasn't supposed to be in. After Max went inside I looked around, thinking maybe there was a hidden camera across the street or something. Then I really started to panic: had I finally turned invisible? I looked at my own hands in disbelief. I couldn't be invisible; the bus had stopped for me.

The whole day I was trying not to be a wimp about everything (the neighborhood wasn't really one I'd pick). But finally I just had to face facts. I told myself "This isn't the place for you. It's in a kinda shitty area, it's a long walk to your bus, there are 3 dogs here that will always be barking, and the guy who owns the place can't SEE you. Move on."

And so I did. I just awkwardly left the porch and walked back to my bus stop. By the time I reached the end of the street I was giggling at how absurd that had been. I came home, removed the number from my phone, and marked dear Max as "spam" in my email.

What's my moral here? For one thing, Craigslist isn't all bad. But, like everything else, eventually something bad (or just less good) will come your way. Just make sure you go in the daylight and bring a large knife.

New Cult Classic Submission: RV

I'm gonna attempt a new recurring segment (which for this blog, means "I may do this twice"). A lot of films are obvious cult classics: The Rocky Horror Picture Show, Army of Darkness, Reefer Madness, just to name a few. These movies didn't do well in their prime, but live on in the hearts of many who enjoy watching them on DVD and poking slight fun (that's a basic definition of a cult film, more or less).

Then there are films like Hocus Pocus and The Goonies that seem to have gained a cult following based on the number of times they've aired on television. So I'd like to look at a few films that maybe didn't draw a lot of attention when they originally aired, but I think deserve a second look. Forget thinking of these movies as "movies" and start watching them tongue-in-cheek.

I have quite a few potentials lined up; I'll start with one of Robin Williams' least-talked-about movies: RV.

RV is a family vacation comedy about a man who drags his family on a cross-country vacation in an obnoxious RV, although he really is traveling to Colorado to present a merger proposal for his boss' company. Cult Indication: The plot is stupid.

RV didn't do well in theaters, and frankly it's not terribly unique (a poor man's National Lampoon's Vacation, one might say). But TBS keeps airing it and I have to say, like drinking wine, it gets better when you do it repeatedly. Here are some of the reasons I think RV will be a cult classic.

1. Robin Williams is a good sport
So it's not his greatest role. Not by a long shot. He still tries though. Williams always has charisma (to me) and so I love watching him deal with his family and coworkers, all who are essentially assholes to him. Whenever he mutters something sarcastic under his breath I always chuckle. Perhaps it's the child in me flashing back to his work in Aladdin, but Robin Williams will always be someone I root for. Even if he's covered in shit.

It should also be mentioned he works well with his co-star Cheryl Hines (not his best scene partner ever, but whatever) but really shines when yelling at Lola, the voice of his GPS. We've all been there right? My family calls GPS "bitch in a box". It's cute.

2. Kristin Chenoweth is in another "piece-of-crap" film
I love the Tony and Emmy-award winning actress as much as the next guy (I wept when they took off Pushing Daisies)...but let's get real: any movie with her in a big role has never done well. Not that it's her fault it's just...she does bad movies? Come on...the neighbor in Bewitched...Danny DeVito's wife in that holiday movie...that new movie Hit and Run that looks dumb.

But, like Robin Williams, she always has fun in her movies. She plays the wife and mother in a roaming, yodeling, trailer-riding family. I mean, come on, this is definitely a role for Chenoweth.

3. Josh Hutcherson's character is ridiculous
Future Hunger Games heartthrob Josh Huthcerson plays Robin Williams' little son in this movie and it's so bizarre. The kid weighs about 60lbs but is a weightlifting rapper. The term "wigger" is crude and maybe only slightly accurate, but that's what we're looking at here. But somehow it works: the little weirdo's excuse for not wanting a family vacation is "no one has thought about how this will effect my weight training schedule". He's like 12.

Here's Josh and a few other "thugs", along with Robin Williams throwing down.

4. This film is like a real family vacation...more or less.
Alright, so in one scene Robin Williams walks INTO A LAKE and drives the RV out of it. And the RV is still running. And no one questions that. It's an absurd moment (one of many) in the film which when you pause to actually think about it, it's hilarious.

But aside from the occasional lapse of reality, this film can ring true. My father loves watching this movie on tv because he states "this is just the kind of shit that happens on vacation". He's mostly referring to the "everything that can go wrong, will go wrong" rule and the unspoken rule that only one person on vacation really wants to go.

5. It ends with a music video; no reason.
The end credits of this film are an absurd two minutes, featuring the cast singing "Get Your Kicks on Route 66". It starts with the couples singing in pairs, which is fine. Cheryl Hines milks her comedic skills as the tone-deaf wife. Kristin Chenoweth yodels for a bit, then hits an opera high note to remind us that she's a star. Then Josh Hutcherson...raps...while Hunter Parrish gives us a beat...time usually freezes at that point. And then Jojo, who has the most boring role of "bitchy teen" finishes the song. What's great about this movie is that it will remind everyone who Jojo was.

So there we go. Just a few of the reasons I think RV should be considered a cult classic. What do we think?

I'd actually like to get people's opinions so LEAVE A COMMENT on this page of what movies you think should be considered cult classics and maybe I'll write about them for "submission". Ooooh interactive blogging, how fun!

Legitimate Honey Boo Boo (Let's Talk About Idiots)

 I have never claimed to be terribly intelligent. I wouldn't say I'm an idiot, but I couldn't explain why the sky is blue or do your taxes for you. I call this blog "the fool speaks" for a reason; it's the ramblings of someone who graduated in the middle of his class and has no clue what he's doing. What scares me is that while I consider myself a fool, I recognize that the world is full of people dumber than I am. And this week, those people seem to be everywhere.

We'll start with latest media frenzy Todd Akin. If you don't know, Mr. Akin is in the House of Representatives for Missouri. During a recent interview about pro-life and pro-choice issues, Mr. Akin declared that pregnancies from rape were "really rare" and that "If it's a legitimate rape, the female body has ways to try to shut the whole thing down." That "whole thing" he's referring to would be conception.

The Fool would like to point out...this is incorrect. If the female body could just turn off the ability to conceive simply because the woman doesn't want to, then there wouldn't be a show called 16 and Pregnant.

Through the beautiful magic of the internet, everyone went wild against Mr. Akin's ridiculous statements. "Where can I get my rape illegitimized?" Highlights on my Twitter feed go to comedian Anthony Jeselnik (Todd Akin makes perfect sense if you replace 'legitimate' with 'anal') and comedian Jen Kirkman (starting a riot grrl band called Legitimate Rape). But I would be remiss if I didn't mention a fellow WVU Theater Alum named Taylor Ferrera. Currently residing in New York, Taylor writes many hilarious political songs and puts them up on youtube, and her latest hit "Legitimate Rape" has received quite a bit of attention. Go check it out!

Comedy aside, here's what's upsetting about Mr. Akin's comments. This man is in his 60's. He has served in the House of Representatives for over 10 years. He is doing incredibly well financially, I'm sure, and I assume also has a loving family. All this, and he doesn't know how conception works. Or perhaps he DOES know how conception works, but chooses not to believe to make a case for his anti-abortion cause. Abortion, by the way, is an issue 60 year old men shouldn't be worrying about.

But enough about dumb politicians. Let's talk about dumb television, my favorite thing in the world to talk about. Lately one of the more popular reality shows called Here Comes Honey Boo Boo. A spinoff of Toddlers and Tiaras, the titular character is a 6 year old "beauty contestant" living in Georgia with her "Mama", papa, and three sisters.

I discovered this show because it was on my own mother's DVR. In the first place, I always argue with her about Toddlers and Tiaras, and child beauty pageants as a whole. Actually, I hate all beauty pageants. In my eyes a beauty pageant is just another way of telling a girl/woman "if you look pretty, smile pretty, and talk nice people will love you. Don't worry about doing anything with your life." Pageant fans probably disagree with me, but fuck off. I just don't see how any contest with a swimsuit competition can fill its competitors with self respect.

Isn't she precious? Or is she looking for "my.....precious....."?

I digress. So I already believe Toddlers and Tiaras is awful, forcing little girls to dress up, put on makeup, wave like creepy ass little animatronics on the "It's a Small World" ride...seriously, who is that helping? The girls become brats, the parents become pussies...blech. But anyway, some little cute chubster with a strong southern accent apparently graced the stage and TLC decided to follow her family home.

I think doing "quick math" would be like doing calculus for this woman.

Now let's get real: people watch this show (Honey Boo Boo) because the family is trash. They tune to make fun of the fact that the whole family needs subtitles even though they all speak English or to count how many chins Mama has. The family buys a pig named "Glitzy", Mama hoards paper towels and other products in the pantry...I'd list more but this is about as much as I could stomach.

Also, her eldest daughter (17) is pregnant. If you've been reading this whole thing, you'll know that means her rape was NOT legitimate.

My own mama has pointed out that Honey Boo Boo's father, Sugar Bear (I know. I know.) drives a pretty nice truck for being poor white trash. Her point being, these people are probably compensated very well for doing this reality show. I agreed: this family has basically sold their privacy and respect for money, and if they're fine with that then good for them.

But I just LOVE the irony that a TV company called "The Learning Channel" (or could also stand for "Tender Loving Care") airs a show specifically for it's viewers to point and laugh at. This isn't the first time it's happened, of course, and won't be the last. And I won't pretend I don't laugh at people, but there's something disturbing about doing it as a country. It's like seeing a crazy person on the street; you may nudge your friend and go "look at that crazy person" but you wouldn't shout "LOOK AT THE FREAKING MORON!" and lead the street in a chorus of laughter. Would you?

What's my point of this?
Todd Akin: House of Representative. Running for Senate. Idiot.
Honey Boo Boo: Child beauty pageant contestant. Pig owner. Idiot.
There's nowhere to hide. We should just reverse their roles: Todd could be on a new TLC show called "Legitimately Akin" and Honey Boo Boo could run for senator.

New York, New Y-Oh crap, it's still raining.

I have just today gotten over a terrible cold that I got last night, one day after returning from my "vacation" to New York City. And by vacation I mean "some old friends were moving a friend into Astoria, so we crammed into a minivan and drove to New York to stay for a weekend." Here is a quick play by play.

THURSDAY NIGHT: Preparing Snacks. I buy a bag of Spicy Nacho Doritos and bake a batch of M&M cookies for the car ride. Both were great decisions.

FRIDAY MORNING: Awaiting pickup in Pittsburgh. While waiting, clean up the garbage outside that some animal got into, clean the litter boxes, pick up some cat vomit, and play with the dog. Finally the ride shows up and I cram into the purple minivan.

FRIDAY AFTERNOON: We make a detour to Delaware to pick up a fifth friend. It rained pretty much the entire drive. Pennsylvania, Maryland, Delaware...every state looks the same when the sky is gray and shitty. But there's corn in Delaware.

FRIDAY EVENING: We go through New Jersey. As gray as the sky was, it was even grayer in New Jersey. There is no color in New Jersey. Just gray and orange. (That's a tan joke).


We make it to New York. We play "Empire State of Mind" over the car radio as we enter, because we're SO ORIGINAL. It was funny at the time. 12 hours in a car and everything's either hideous or funny.

We finally reach Astoria and move our friend Anielle in. She actually has a pretty nice apartment. Actually, all the apartments we saw that weekend were nice by New York standards. I usually rate apartments based on "how much more comfortable is this apartment than the car?".

We do a bit of driving around. Our team splits up into two separate apartments (one in Brooklyn, one in Astoria) and pass out for the night.

SATURDAY MORNING: Our original plans to rush a Broadway show were scrapped when we realized we just didn't move fast enough. But that was ok, so we went to have brunch instead. We found a nice little restaurant called Five Points that served fantastic brunch. I had the sausage eggs Benedict (as delicious as it looks), my friend Mara had what was essentially egg lasagna, and my friend Jack had a BLT that he raved about for the rest of the trip. A triumphant breakfast, to say the least.

After brunch we set out to find Roni-Sue's candy shoppe, a place I'd read about in a book that has really unique truffles and chocolates. It took us a while to find the place, but it was well worth it when we did. I bought chocolate covered bacon and a truffle with White Russian inside. No regrets!

We then took a brief timeout at a little park. You could do nothing in this park. No skateboarding. No ball playing. And my favorite:

"No Loitering".

In a freaking park. I guess we broke the law?

SATURDAY AFTERNOON: We go to an H&M store so people can shop and I can walk around aimlessly. While there Mara decides she's going to throw up. So I take her outside to find a restroom. We eventually succeed in finding a little shop/Chinese buffet where she makes use of the bathroom and I buy a Vitamin water. Mara decides she wants to take a nap, so we retreat back to our friend Helene's apartment. I read my Kindle, and then also take a nap. That may sound like a waste of vacation, but really we were just happy to be out of our towns.

SATURDAY EVENING: We go to a nice Sushi place, J.J.'s something or other. I never had sushi yet I got a giant box of everything. I like the chicken and the little rolls and the dumplings. The meats were hit and miss, and I actually liked a tiny bit of Wasabi. After dinner Mara, Jack, and I were in charge of fetching the big minivan and bringing it back to Anielle's apartment. It took us at least an hour to find a parking spot. I finished off the Doritos that I rediscovered on the floor.

SATURDAY NIGHT: Jack and I decide we're not done with the day so we go explore the Astoria area. There are a few clubs and bars around, and we eventually decide on a place called Los Margaritas. Upon grabbing a menu, Jack reads the first item and says "Let's just split a pitcher of margaritas and get drunk right here." I agreed.

The waitress dropped this off at the table and then we literally didn't see her again for two hours. It was an awesome time though, just drinking outside in New York City in the middle of the night.

We eventually succeeded. We managed to relocate the apartment and stumbled inside, laughing hysterically and waking up a totally not amused Mara. Whoopsie.

SUNDAY MORNING: Brunch again. I forget the name of this place, but I had an omelet with French Fries in it, so ha.

SUNDAY IN GENERAL: We drove. We drove for hours and hours until it didn't seem possible we'd ever get there. But we did. As long as the car ride was, I was with some of my favorite people in the whole world and that made it so much better.

So that was my little vacation. Monday I was late for work, and then got the beginnings of a cold. Tuesday (this morning) I couldn't get out of bed because I hurt so much. I don't know what happened, I must of touched something gross on the subway and then touched my mouth. Oh well, New York New York!

Thunderstorms, Fallen Trees, Mace, and a side of home fries.

It's been quite the weekend for me. Having a lot more time off than usual I decided to make a trip to Morgantown to visit my best friend Mara for her birthday. Since my little deathrap died, I had to rely on my parent to take me from Pittsburgh to my little town o' Moundsville.

Little did I know that in addition to me, a ROUGH summer storm was also heading for Moundsville, and many other towns near it. I got home on Friday afternoon. After a day catching up and eating ice cream, we were going to go visit my cousin. However, before we could leave, the storm struck. Wind blew trees everywhere and eventually, as is the case, our power went out. When the storm subsided we tried to leave, only we didn't make it very far as there were trees down all over our lane. My sister and I moved some of the smaller trees out of our way, but our uncle eventually took his trusty chainsaw and tractor to clear the larger branches.

Our neighbors, however, won the contest for biggest tree lost. This giant pine tree next to their house fell over, not blocking the road but still quite an impressive sight.

Someone's going to have an AWESOME Christmas though.

So the power was (and, as of right now, is) still out. My relatives all resort to using their generators. I run over to sleep at my grandparents house (I need a fan sound to sleep...I'm a princess that way). Saturday morning my dad and I set out to get a generator from my cousin. We went into town...Dad's truck needed gas. There are about 5 gas stations in town. Only two of them had power. We had to wait a while.

I was yelling at people. "EVERYONE PAY AT THE PUMP, IT TAKES TOO LONG OTHERWISE!"

Finally we succeeded and shortly afterwards my sister and I abandoned ship to Morgantown. After transporting her bed (my old bed) to her new house I met up with Mara and her boyfriend Nate. We had some wine and headed out to Downtown Morgantown. First stop was bdubs; I needed to get some chicken in me. There we met up with our old buddy Jack and we headed to Vice Versa, Morgantown's gay bar.

Our plan was to go bar hopping, but we're kinda lazy people so we stayed at Vice. Plus, Captain Morgan is my friend. We eventually learned there would be a short Strip/Drag show. I don't have any pics or vids of the stripper Kennedy Morgan (sorry, loyal fans) however I took some video of the Drag show. Because the drag queen, a Molly Belle Cummings, did a number to 4 Non Blonde's "What's Up?" which is like my favorite worst song ever.

 

So, a bit more rum and a little dancing (I dance like Elaine from Seinfeld. Seriously, people left.) and we eventually decided to go home. Except we couldn't, because apparently the police were macing people right outside. So we had to wait a bit. Eventually we made our escape. 

The next morning, Mara and I headed to brunch at one of her favorites, The Golden Finch. I had eaten there before, and it was delicious then. I had banana chocolate chip pancakes, but this time I went for something cheesier: an Italian Ham omelet.

Their presentation was better, I had already dug into this mess.

It was a delicious omelet, with all sorts of veggies mixed in with the ham and cheese. Also got a side of home fries with onions, some toast, and a little fruit. Although I've only eaten there twice, I would strongly recommend hitting it up if you're in Morgantown, it's a great little place.

 

 

The interior of the Finch.

After breakfast, Mara and I decided to see an early movie. The movie was Rock of Ages. We didn't like it. I wrote a rather harsh review about it. And then, a nice truck ride back to Pittsbugh.

So yes, that was fun times, no? And I expect them to continue. I'm seeing Magic Mike tomorrow with some friends (keeping in the stripping theme of late) and Friday going to a Pirates game. Can't wait!